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She just like an average young lady finished her pre-U and waiting to start a college education. And then, a bout illness and anaemia hits her and change her life.  She was diagnosed of leukaemia and so, went through lengthy treatment of chemotherapy. And today she was just informed by the doctor that her bone marrow result still showing large amount of blast cells.  She just had been told that there is no cure for her cancer. She may receive cyclical amount of chemo to control her disease, ultimately, the system will fail eventually. And she is just 20 year-old.


Sound exactly like the girl in the movie.  In the love story, the girl hopes for a miracle and she get it, well she eventually fall in love and get married in a short time and live happily till the end.

That’s life I guess. I do hope she can still go for her college no matter what; it will be a good experience for her. Currently her condition allows her to go on (at least for a while).

Best of luck and May you be happy.


I read Atul Gawande book “Complications” when I was still a medical student. I reread the book again after becoming medical officer.

I realized and really understand what he is writing of putting a central line and so forth.

The stuff that a  medical school can offer is really inadequate. But then a med school can’t teach students everything.

It’s is due to the fact that knowledge and skills can’t be taught and the only way is to have hand-on experience.

Med school did taught mundane tasks like putting CBD and blood C+S; When I recalled my school days, I’m a bloody idiot who had failed the blood C+S procedure station in my first professional exam eon ago.

The acquisition of skills such as simple surgical skill – suturing is a must; able to set a line – subclavian or femoral or internal jugular is a must;  do able to perform bone marrow aspiration and LP are important and finally able to perform  advance life support skill which is “intubation” is a must;  I had almost learn it but left out the ALS;

We know the patient was dying slowly. She had been warded for almost a month.  Post chemotherapy had rendered her body frailer and despite countless dose of antibiotics and GCSF, the patient’s immune system had fail to response and fight the rampant infection.

And finally, yesterday, her BP became low in the afternoon and soon required inotrope, then by evening, her breathing getting worse. And then she stopped breathing on her own.  CPR was just a futile effort.

I made an attempt to call in anaest to get her intubated before her conditions worsen and while I trying to break the bad news to her husband who tears flow freely, I found myself overcame by my emotion and I barely able to contain myself  and I choked on my words ( I hope pt’s husband had not noticed it). I went to MO room and let my emotion to be stable before I came out.

I had been in service for past 3 years and I saw the passing of patients and I still found myself react to the event.

Maybe a vulnerable moment make us a better doctor.

A  quick googling and found this article in BMJ, which concluded:

“Doctors who spend a longer time caring for their patients get to know them better but this also makes them more vulnerable to feelings of loss when these patients die. Medical teams may benefit from debriefing within the department to give junior doctors an opportunity to share emotional responses and reflect on the patient’s death.”

The above quote is from Dr. D’Alessandri, Dean of a medical school in US.

New York Times had published an article on the setting up of new medical schools in US to cater for the needs of health.

There are more new law schools being set up at the same time.

To quote from the article

they would amount to an 18 percent increase in the 131 medical schools across the country. (By comparison, there are 200 law schools approved by the American Bar Association.) ”

At the end of the article,

Dr. D’Alessandri said, he was not worried that he might produce too many doctors for the good of society. “We should worry about too many lawyers,”

And after reading the article, I’m not that  worry about our country new medical schools. After all, we may need it.

The highlight of CCTV annual CNY show is when Wang Fei take to the stage and sang cover version of Legend.

The song  consists of 3 chords which is G, Am, and D.



G                               Am


D                                  G


G                               Am


D                                  G


G                      Am


D                      G


G                   Am


D                       G












王菲(Faye Wong)- 《傳奇》(Live)(2010年央視春節聯歡晚會)

February 2010
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